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Dear Mr. Not-So-Incredible:

I bet a man has never asked you out while dressed as Mr. Incredible. 

Let me backup a little……..

We have all experienced the thrill of meeting someone who seems like the perfect package. Charming, good-looking, and seemingly flawless. But what happens when that seemingly perfect person turns out to be too good to be true? 

Buckle up, because I’m about to share the rollercoaster ride Mr. Not-So-Incredible took me on.

The Initial Encounter-The Charm Offensive: I met him online. He was one of those matches that you swipe right on at 11pm and in the morning you’re left trying to figure out which version of yourself made that choice. He pursued me heavily for months. I wasn’t into it. The man had his own pair of bowling shoes and the kind of dad-joke personality that even Chandler BIng wouldn’t have appreciated.Then one day, he pulls out all the stops and asks me out while wearing a Mr. Incredible costume. And after a few bad dates with other men, my morale was just low enough to give him a shot.

Plot twist ….I liked him. He was not the goob I thought he was, and he swept me off my feet a little bit with his smooth talk and irresistible charm. He was witty, charismatic, and knew all the right things to say. I couldn’t help but be drawn to his magnetic personality. Little did I know that the wild ride was just beginning.

The Perfect Image-Too Good to Be True: Mr. Not-So-Incredible seemed to have it all together. He was successful, ambitious, and had a seemingly perfect life. He took me on fun dates, was consistent in his communication, and made me feel adored and special. But deep down, the jaded part of me started to wonder if this picture-perfect man was too good to be true.

The Red Flags-Cracks in the Mask: As time went by, I started noticing some peculiarities. When out together, he was always very aware of the men who noticed me, and he showed flashes of unnecessary jealousy. After only a handful of dates, he wanted to be exclusive, and he definitely enjoyed his cocktails. I brushed off these red flags, thinking that maybe I was just being paranoid. After all, he’s Mr. Incredible, right?

The Unveiling-The Truth Comes Out: One fateful day, the truth finally revealed itself. Out of the blue, Mr. Not-So-Incredible tells me via text message that we aren’t compatible. Which would be okay, if it didn’t directly contradict every other thing he had ever told me. I will spare you the gory details, but It turns out that Mr. Not-So-Incredible had quite a few secrets he had failed to share with me, along with a nasty temper. But I won’t lie, the shock and disappointment hit me like a ton of bricks. And it shouldn’t have. I was not a rookie dater at this point, but I forgot to follow my own advice. It takes 3-4 months (or less) for a person’s mask to slip and reveal their true colors. I should have known better than to fall for the version of himself he showed me in the beginning.

The Aftermath-Picking Up the Pieces: Once the truth was out, I was left alone to piece together what had just transpired. I realized that the person I thought I knew, was nothing more than a master manipulator. It was another painful lesson, but one that reminded me how important it is to trust my instincts and not be blinded by surface-level charm.

Dating Mr. Not-So-Incredible was a wild and eye-opening experience. It served as a reminder that sometimes things are in fact too good to be true, and it’s important to look beyond the surface. While this process can be painful, and less fun than living behind rose colored glasses, it ultimately leads to personal growth and a better understanding of what you truly deserve in a partner. 

The question remains, could Mr. Not-So-Incredible have been the real deal, but couldn’t get out of his own way? Or was the cape he swooped in with fake from the start? I think we know the answer. 

In true Mr. Not-So-Incredible fashion, he circles back like clockwork every few months. He must not know that I am also a superhero, and spidey-senses trump super human bullshit. 

In a world where self-worth and empowerment are paramount, it is essential for individuals to recognize their value and not allow people to circle back into their lives. It is a powerful act of self-respect and self-love to set boundaries and refuse to entertain those who have previously shown a lack of commitment or respect. 

By refusing to let them circle back, individuals assert their worth and prioritize their own happiness and well-being. It is a reminder that one deserves someone who consistently shows up and values them, rather than settling for inconsistent or disrespectful behavior. Embracing this mindset empowers individuals to create healthier relationships and cultivate a life filled with genuine connections and mutual respect.

So, to my single people, stay strong, keep your eyes open, and remember that true love is worth waiting for, even if it means weeding out the Mr. Not-So-Incredibles along the way.

Allison Rose  


Allison Rose

Founder at Filter Free Bullsh!t Free

Entrepreneurship is my addiction, Sharing my story and empowering others is my passion. My girl gang, my family and tequila shots fuel my soul & calm my head. I’m here to inspire and to be inspired.

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