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Rejection is a redirection, not your reflection

by | Nov 14, 2023 | A-Ha Moments, All, Life Lessons, My Stories, My Struggles, Personal Development, Relationships, The Adventures of Dating

I see too many people beating themselves up when they feel rejected by someone. In the world of dating, rejection can be a common feeling. Technology has created a world where at any given moment the ability to meet someone is at your fingertips, and while there are benefits to this, it has also created a noisy, competitive and often lazy dating environment. Hence increasing your chances of being rejected by someone you are interested in. This is all part of the mind numbing, rather poke your own eyes out, dating process, but it’s important to remember that being rejected by another person does not define you.

Don’t get me wrong, there are few worse emotional feelings than being rejected by a person you want. Almost immediately, we begin to ask ourselves difficult questions:

Why am I not good enough?
What did I do?
What’s wrong with me?
Am I ugly?


When these thoughts are left uncontrolled, they mutate into cancer within ourselves. Rejection does not define us unless we allow it to. We must never allow these feelings to consume us, and instead, we must use them as an opportunity to grow stronger.

In dating, we tend to take rejection so personally. Many of us genuinely operate out of the scarcity mindset, choosing to believe that we will struggle to find somebody else like that person.


Let’s gain some perspective here. There are billions of people on this planet. There are countless dating apps, events, and opportunities to meet new people. You need to develop an abundance mindset — the belief that no matter what happens, there is someone else to meet who is going to be even better than the last.

This attitude should apply to everything in your life. Rather than worrying about saving pennies, could you consider making more money? Instead of allowing rejection to immobilize you, look at it as a chance to be free, and explore all the possibilities!

Rejection is inevitable, everyone is going to face rejection at one point. Whether in relationships, in work, or in our social circles, it doesn’t matter — it is going to happen. And romantic rejection can be one of the most potent threats to our self-esteem. Within moments, negative opinions of our self are irrationally formed and engrained into our psyche as truths, and we often rationalize that who we are is not enough.

Again, STOP IT!

I know that we can’t always control the crazy sh*t that comes into our heads, but we can control how we deal with it. If you take this approach, you will realize that rejection does not define you or dictate your self-worth — you do!

Allison Rose

Allison Rose

Founder at Filter Free Bullsh!t Free

Entrepreneurship is my addiction, Sharing my story and empowering others is my passion. My girl gang, my family and tequila shots fuel my soul & calm my head. I’m here to inspire and to be inspired.

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